Yes, the mother is being an asshole. Those are her kids, we would say the same thing of a father who wanted nothing to do with his kids. Those kids will grow up knowing their mom was being selfish and will feel unloved. Sure the situation didn’t start that way, but that’s how it is with having kids, once you have them, they stay yours, as does the responsibility. There is nothing wrong with enjoying your freedom, but not giving in for the kid’s sake has nothing to do with her ex, and everything to do with her being selfish. It’s a dick move .